Here are the best excuses so far, as invented by me, the boy and the roommate:
"I'm sorry, I can't come into work today, ancient spirits of evil have transformed this decayed body to Mum-Ra, the ever living!"
"I'm sorry, I can't come into work today, no one steps on a church in my town."
"I'm sorry, I can't come into work today, the seagulls have started speaking in the tongues of men as a sign of the end times."
"I'm sorry, I can't come into work today, all will look upon me and despair."
"I'm sorry, I can't come into work today, I'd do anything for love, but I won't do that."
"I'm sorry, I can't come into work today, one pill made me larger."
Sadly, I will be in work tomorrow. *sigh*
"I'm sorry, I can't come into work today, ancient spirits of evil have transformed this decayed body to Mum-Ra, the ever living!"
"I'm sorry, I can't come into work today, no one steps on a church in my town."
"I'm sorry, I can't come into work today, the seagulls have started speaking in the tongues of men as a sign of the end times."
"I'm sorry, I can't come into work today, all will look upon me and despair."
"I'm sorry, I can't come into work today, I'd do anything for love, but I won't do that."
"I'm sorry, I can't come into work today, one pill made me larger."
Sadly, I will be in work tomorrow. *sigh*