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beccatoriaOkay, so for a while I've been meaning to write up my thoughts on the Emma/Regina ship and why I can't get on board with it and since I just watched the most recent episode and it dealt with a past romance on Emma's part, I figured I might as well just get it all out there at once. So first I will express my concerns about Emma's relationship with SPOILER and then I will talk about my tragic inability to believe it could ever work out with Regina either.
Okay, so, there are three reasons why I fear this development.
1) Setting up Emma with Henry's dad is gonna be really hard to do without making it look like they're trying to retroactively make an honest woman out of her, or tie together babies with true love. I get this show is all about love - and, yes, true love - but as the season one finale showed, that doesn't have to be a narrow definition. Come on, show, DON'T MAKE IT NARROW.
2) Oh god, don't make him Baelfire. I really, really, really think they're gonna make him Baelfire. And I don't really care how easy it is to fake up some plot reason why fairytale land folks end up drawn to each other, or even that since Rumpelstiltskin cast the curse to get to the same land as his son, and obviously there was some kind of magical compulsion/destiny that was going to bring Emma back to Storybrooke, he unwittingly tied his son into that tale too - it still feels ridiculously convenient. Plus I just...really? Must we? Must we?
3) Emma's life is so defined by the fact she has been endlessly and repeatedly let down by people she loves and trusts. I worry that Neal's behaviour will be cast as Emma misconstruing his actions as letting her down because it's easy to pin all the blame on August (and don't get me wrong WTF AUGUST, but I at least feel I'm supposed to be pissed at him). Thing is, what Neal actually did, though, was let her down. He may have had noble or ignoble intentions; maybe Emma would even have cared if she knew them, but ultimately he chose to let her down, to leave her, to do something she couldn't predict, so that he wasn't there when she was counting on him, and he did that deliberately. He told Emma she could rely on him, and then he chose to be unreliable. The pain was real, the decision was real, and he had other options. Do not forget this, television show.
And now we move on to the ship I WISH I shipped. Because I'm really quite taken with it as an idea. It's fantastic that it's gained so much public traction, and I can completely see why because the entire show is basically the Gay Parent Trap and that's hilarious. But it also works narratively because there's all sorts of interesting ideas about the curse being broken by giving the Evil Queen a happy ending, about Snow being responsible for taking away Regina's love and returning it to her - if they could pull it off, it'd be a neat narrative twist and a satisfying one.
But can they? I...don't know, but at the moment I don't buy it. There's too much pain there. As a character, I think Regina's fantastic and I'm really happy and relieved that the second season is giving her a more nuanced backstory (although I also hope it steers clear of making her solely the victim; I want to understand why she's so toxic, not absolve her of toxicity).
Regina's a villain. A beautiful, complicated, tragic villain who has caused so much pain and heartache I honestly find it difficult if not impossible to imagine Emma forgiving that. If Emma were more like Snow, then maybe, sure. But Emma's Emma and Emma's a hurt, damaged person, too.
Before she discovered who she really was, and before she realised that Regina was framing Snow, then, yes, I think I could have bought blazing sexual tension ratcheting into a more substantive relationship; Emma's main concerns about Regina's treatment of Henry are so tied up at that point with her own emotions about him and her choices that it could have been a healing process for all of them.
But as soon as she realised that Regina was no-holds-barred out to destroy Snow, I think that bridge got burned and good. Because that's when Emma started realising Regina was functioning on a level that was almost sociopathic in many regards. Emma has had very, very few people she's trusted over the years. Snow is, by her own admission, the closest thing she has to family and a best friend - and I believe that means more to her than she will ever admit, even before she learns the truth about their relationship. Even with the complicated abandonment issues she clearly wants to work through with Snow, it also only increases her near pathological fear of losing the only person she's ever had who hasn't profoundly and totally let her down. I think hurting Snow is a one-way ticket to Emma hating you. And unlike Snow, she's not looking for a way to forgive; she's not secure enough.
In addition, Emma is enormously wounded by her upbringing and hugely resentful of it. It now turns out that, in a very real way, Regina is the one responsible. Everything Emma went through growing up - including the fact she now has to be "the Saviour" - something she makes very clear to August she considers a completely unfair and terrifying prospect - that she got all of that instead of being brought up by people who loved her, is directly Regina's fault.
Do I think that she'd wish Henry away and a life as a Princess into being? Not for a second, but do I think that being shown snatches of the life full of love that she could have had, always through the lens of how she lost that chance, is exquisitely painful to her? Yeah. And to a degree I don't know I think she'll ever be able to truly "get over". I actually wonder how much she's consciously allowed herself to think about it at all. I think the day she really puts any thought to that equation is going to be...interesting.
I can see Emma coming to respect Regina. I can see Henry having a positive, loving relationship with both his mothers. I can see Henry forming a bridge between Regina and the House of White once more and I want that.
But I don't know that, at the deepest levels of her being, Emma will ever be able to truly forgive and accept what Regina did to her, or the callous, selfish cruelty with which she tried to frame her best friend/mother for murder.
And honestly, I'm not sure she should either. In fact, I hope Emma confronts her about it. I do love their relationship, in all its conflict-driven, difficult glory. I want then to scream at each other, and then uneasily work together, and come to reluctant truces and tentative mutual respect, but I'm not sure I ever want to lose that razor edge of raw pain underneath.
Regina has done terrible, brutal, violent things. And I think I want to see her fall in love with someone, once again.
But not with Emma.
And there you have it. My antiship manifesto.
Okay, so, there are three reasons why I fear this development.
1) Setting up Emma with Henry's dad is gonna be really hard to do without making it look like they're trying to retroactively make an honest woman out of her, or tie together babies with true love. I get this show is all about love - and, yes, true love - but as the season one finale showed, that doesn't have to be a narrow definition. Come on, show, DON'T MAKE IT NARROW.
2) Oh god, don't make him Baelfire. I really, really, really think they're gonna make him Baelfire. And I don't really care how easy it is to fake up some plot reason why fairytale land folks end up drawn to each other, or even that since Rumpelstiltskin cast the curse to get to the same land as his son, and obviously there was some kind of magical compulsion/destiny that was going to bring Emma back to Storybrooke, he unwittingly tied his son into that tale too - it still feels ridiculously convenient. Plus I just...really? Must we? Must we?
3) Emma's life is so defined by the fact she has been endlessly and repeatedly let down by people she loves and trusts. I worry that Neal's behaviour will be cast as Emma misconstruing his actions as letting her down because it's easy to pin all the blame on August (and don't get me wrong WTF AUGUST, but I at least feel I'm supposed to be pissed at him). Thing is, what Neal actually did, though, was let her down. He may have had noble or ignoble intentions; maybe Emma would even have cared if she knew them, but ultimately he chose to let her down, to leave her, to do something she couldn't predict, so that he wasn't there when she was counting on him, and he did that deliberately. He told Emma she could rely on him, and then he chose to be unreliable. The pain was real, the decision was real, and he had other options. Do not forget this, television show.
And now we move on to the ship I WISH I shipped. Because I'm really quite taken with it as an idea. It's fantastic that it's gained so much public traction, and I can completely see why because the entire show is basically the Gay Parent Trap and that's hilarious. But it also works narratively because there's all sorts of interesting ideas about the curse being broken by giving the Evil Queen a happy ending, about Snow being responsible for taking away Regina's love and returning it to her - if they could pull it off, it'd be a neat narrative twist and a satisfying one.
But can they? I...don't know, but at the moment I don't buy it. There's too much pain there. As a character, I think Regina's fantastic and I'm really happy and relieved that the second season is giving her a more nuanced backstory (although I also hope it steers clear of making her solely the victim; I want to understand why she's so toxic, not absolve her of toxicity).
Regina's a villain. A beautiful, complicated, tragic villain who has caused so much pain and heartache I honestly find it difficult if not impossible to imagine Emma forgiving that. If Emma were more like Snow, then maybe, sure. But Emma's Emma and Emma's a hurt, damaged person, too.
Before she discovered who she really was, and before she realised that Regina was framing Snow, then, yes, I think I could have bought blazing sexual tension ratcheting into a more substantive relationship; Emma's main concerns about Regina's treatment of Henry are so tied up at that point with her own emotions about him and her choices that it could have been a healing process for all of them.
But as soon as she realised that Regina was no-holds-barred out to destroy Snow, I think that bridge got burned and good. Because that's when Emma started realising Regina was functioning on a level that was almost sociopathic in many regards. Emma has had very, very few people she's trusted over the years. Snow is, by her own admission, the closest thing she has to family and a best friend - and I believe that means more to her than she will ever admit, even before she learns the truth about their relationship. Even with the complicated abandonment issues she clearly wants to work through with Snow, it also only increases her near pathological fear of losing the only person she's ever had who hasn't profoundly and totally let her down. I think hurting Snow is a one-way ticket to Emma hating you. And unlike Snow, she's not looking for a way to forgive; she's not secure enough.
In addition, Emma is enormously wounded by her upbringing and hugely resentful of it. It now turns out that, in a very real way, Regina is the one responsible. Everything Emma went through growing up - including the fact she now has to be "the Saviour" - something she makes very clear to August she considers a completely unfair and terrifying prospect - that she got all of that instead of being brought up by people who loved her, is directly Regina's fault.
Do I think that she'd wish Henry away and a life as a Princess into being? Not for a second, but do I think that being shown snatches of the life full of love that she could have had, always through the lens of how she lost that chance, is exquisitely painful to her? Yeah. And to a degree I don't know I think she'll ever be able to truly "get over". I actually wonder how much she's consciously allowed herself to think about it at all. I think the day she really puts any thought to that equation is going to be...interesting.
I can see Emma coming to respect Regina. I can see Henry having a positive, loving relationship with both his mothers. I can see Henry forming a bridge between Regina and the House of White once more and I want that.
But I don't know that, at the deepest levels of her being, Emma will ever be able to truly forgive and accept what Regina did to her, or the callous, selfish cruelty with which she tried to frame her best friend/mother for murder.
And honestly, I'm not sure she should either. In fact, I hope Emma confronts her about it. I do love their relationship, in all its conflict-driven, difficult glory. I want then to scream at each other, and then uneasily work together, and come to reluctant truces and tentative mutual respect, but I'm not sure I ever want to lose that razor edge of raw pain underneath.
Regina has done terrible, brutal, violent things. And I think I want to see her fall in love with someone, once again.
But not with Emma.
And there you have it. My antiship manifesto.
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no subject
Date: 2012-11-06 09:48 pm (UTC)Was not a fan of Neal. At all. The idea of Emma legitimately being with some dude, any dude, gives me lots of sad faces.
One of the reasons I love Emma so much as a character is that it seems like her relationship arcs are more about family, not dudes, and I want it to stay that way. Like you said, there is so much pain there, so much on her emotional plate to work through, that adding some BS romance would seem out of place. And also I think nothing gets better than those Snow/Emma scenes, really.
no subject
Date: 2012-11-07 06:42 pm (UTC)And yeah, I don't personally see it (could have during s1 but not so much now), but I completely understand why people would read a fucked up hatesex kind of relationship there; I just don't think, unlike some relationship that start that way, it could ever go further. Like you, I just cannot see fluff at any point along the curve.
Neal was just...I don't know. Because I was predisposed to dislike him because I fear narrative failure in introducing Henry's father, I'm worried I'm judging overly harshly, but dude felt like a cookie-cutter hipster thief perfectly calculated to be "charming" with no actual soul. He just felt really constructed. And that made me not care. Well, plus the fact that he screwed Emma over big time but I think I'll be expected to blame that entirely on August. :/
I'm also hoping that Emma's storylines stay focused on her family relationships - and yeah, her scenes with Snow so far this season have been excellent, particularly - but I'm kind of trying to minimise my expectations since I think we're in for romance with someone. :(
no subject
Date: 2012-11-06 11:40 pm (UTC)And, yes, as amusing and fun to read Emma/Regina I don't know how they can get read of all that bad history. Emma isn't like Snow, who is like you said looking for ways to forgive Regina but that's because of Snow's own history with Regina.
ETA: It's weird that now, after seeing all the alternatives they keep throwing at Emma I kind of ship Emma/Graham because out of everyone he has no agenda and least likely to takeover Emma's narrative (*cough*PeterBishop*cough*)
no subject
Date: 2012-11-07 06:57 pm (UTC)After all the alternatives I still don't really ship her with Graham, though I accept your points, mainly because I resented him at the time as being so...so much the guy she was getting set up with because he was there and little else? And then so happy when they turned that on its head?
But if I had to pick someone for her, I honestly think I'd choose the Mad Hatter, which is ridiculous since he freaking kidnapped her, but I dunno, I guess I feel similarly about him not taking over her narrative because he's fairly tangential, but he's also independently interesting. And while he kidnapped her, odd as this may sound, his poor treatment of her wasn't really about her, or him wanting to control her in the patriarchal bullshit fashion that both August AND Neal collude in?
I mean, ultimately I prefer no one. But if I had to pick, I think I'd choose Jefferson. Or possibly I just find Sebastian Stan the most attractive out of all of those options... ;)
no subject
Date: 2012-11-08 12:27 am (UTC)But wouldn't it be great if, after all that effort, it turns out Bae already passed away? Like... what if the person Gold thought was Bae actually is Bae's great grandson or something.
Hmm I'm not so fond of Jefferson these days but they do have chemistry (this show and real life couples!). I do wish that none of the guys they push at her are going to stick around.
no subject
Date: 2012-11-07 03:53 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-11-07 07:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-11-21 10:51 pm (UTC)The only resolution I would be happy with is for Emma to tell Neal to fuck off and die when he inevitably turns up, but I doubt that's where the show is going. I'm really worried that they've set up Emma's arc to be all about TWOOOO WUUUUUUV with that douchebag, which is nauseating. In my opinion, it might be *less* gross if he's Baelfire (which he totally is), precisely because it is easier to fanwank fairytale logics for their attraction which are less organic to Emma.
no subject
Date: 2012-11-24 12:55 pm (UTC)As to the Baelfire thing (and yes, he totally is, because otherwise believing a magical stranger makes even less sense, argh - go on show, don't do that,/i>, impress me, damn it), you have a good point. I think I'm really reacting to two thing - 1) the ickiness of Neal as a romantic concept, and 2) the cheesy convenience of Neal ~sekritly being Baelfire. And I assumed that, because that cheesy convenience is in many ways tied to him being a love interest, I overlooked the fact that they are, still, two separate issues, and while I hate them both, you're right, 2) mitigates 1), because cheesy and crummy as ~the curse~ drawing them together under these circumstances is, and much as it probably doesn't imply that the show will deal with how that's kinda choice-stealing, it's still, as you say, better in some ways because, well. Because it's choice-stealing fairytale logic that's not Emma's fault. :/
I think, though, that the fairytale logic could apply to other characters too; not as strongly, because no curse, but there would still be the element of coincidence mitigated by ~magical~ history. I'm putting my hopes on him being the Wizard of Oz.
no subject
Date: 2012-11-22 05:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-11-24 01:29 pm (UTC)As to the comment on forgiveness; yeah, I guess that is the ultimate issue I see as a problem. Or, rather, not the forgiveness itself; if Emma could stop being angry, she'd be able to, I imagine. It's not that I see her as unforgiving per se. Just...really, really betrayed and hurt and angry. And I don't know that I see her able to move past it, really? Which is why the fragmentary, nonlinear issue is something necessary for me before I can imagine them in a relationship because I just...can't actually visualise all the steps in between.
And yeah, I don't think anyone actually believes the show is headed toward Swan Queen. Well, okay, probably some people do. Probably people with the same level of optimism you'd need to believe that Neal isn't going to wander into the show at the end of S2 and DESTROY EVERYTHING I LOVE. Bah.
(Mulan/Aurora, though? I honestly thought they might go there for a few episodes earlier this season. Not so much now though.)
*clings to fanon*